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Happy friendship day

Today we love what tomorrow we hate;
today we seek what tomorrow we shun;
today we desire what tomorrow we fear
-by Robinson Crusoe.

So apt was Mr. Robinson Crusoe when he said the above lines. We human beings are such a bundle of contradiction and so much subservient to our heart that we tend to love something only to hate it later on.

The only place where I become blatantly honest is this blog. This is the last place where I would like to be pretentious. Hence, when I say that even though I am a solitary person who finds books better than human beings, I do have the desire to have a true friend.

But the moment I spend some time to get to know a person, out of my desire, I become afraid to lose the same person, provided the person has a semblance of virtues that I look for. Deep down in my heart I want someone who would never leave me no matter what I do. I want an unconditional love from that person even when the destiny makes me a puppet of some loser.

A reason for that fear is because of my tendency to strongly become attached to a person whom I happen to like. So much does the attachment becomes strong that I lose my stability and gets drawn to that person. And of course, because of the difference in my ideologies, when that person breaks the string of attachments, I become despondent to say the least.

Hence, I believe that friendship should happen between people who are ideologically same, who have the same virtues as postulated by Socrates. However, it is difficult to find people who carry exactly the same virtues. One life is not enough to find a person similar to the ideologies that you believe in.

I don't shy away from calling myself a rational person. I need to have solutions to the problems that I face. My problem is that I am afraid of getting attached to people. Attachments bring sufferings and I don't want to suffer. I have had enough of sufferings.

My logic gives me an effective solution to this problem. In no point, however, am I trying to preach it here. Just trying to put forward a theory which I find quite useful while dealing with attachments and the consequent sufferings.

If I have that great a tendency to get attached to a person, then I make it a point to form the same kind of attachment to everyone that comes in that frame of reference. If I am biased to one person, then I make sure that I am biased to everyone. If I love one person then I force myself to show the same affection to everyone. This nullifies every kind of attachment and makes me liberated and thus free from suffering. This also allows me to remain a monk amidst the monkeys, in a way.

No, I don't have any true friend. But I do have my own penchants for some people and I am afraid of losing them. Hence I make sure that I treat every individual that I come across with the same amount of liking. I won't term that level of interaction or liking as a true friendship, which definitely is hard to come by, but if one has to call it as friendship, then make no doubt that I am indeed a friend to everyone that I come across with the same level of affection as I like to have with those few individuals.

The entire humanity is my friend, my friend and I am liberated from that humanity in my own way. It helps me be good to all and keeps my sanity hinged. Also, it allows me to celebrate not just one day for this friendship as I, on the same argument as presented above, celebrate every mere day as the friendship day.

On an optimistic note, I wish you all a happy friendship day, for each and every day that you come across.


  1. Indeed finding a good friend is difficult. Especially if we we are searching for the ideal one. The desire for community is strong while the desire for one's own personal safety is stronger. Paradoxes of life.

    1. So well said, Tomichan. We struggle between those two desires and at the end personal safety needs to have an upper hand. It needs to protect our soul from getting sliced into pieces.

      Life is but a big paradox.

  2. Nice post...To get a true friend is being truly blessed and not everyone are blessed.:)
    Happy friendship day !!!

    1. Definitely. Not everyone has the fortune of getting a true friend. Books, however, help a lot in such cases of misfortunes.


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